How It Started…

TLDR: My road to feeling comfortable running in my sports bra has been anything but sexy. Ditching diet culture and working towards body image resilience has been anything but easy.

Growing up, I was self-conscious and like many, yo-yo dieted (or really starved myself and lived in a low energy availability state) for most of my school years. I wasn’t athletic and I only went to the gym to punish myself for something I’d eaten or in an attempt to make myself smaller.

Then, after my younger brother Scott suddenly passed away when I was 19, I gained and in the following years, lost over 100 pounds. I was celebrated and applauded for my weight loss. But I was anything but healthy. I was consumed with my weight and body image and I restricted what I ate, made myself sick when I had something I didn’t think I should, went to the gym twice a day, lived in low energy availability, and was really struggling to feel anything but sad about what I saw when I looked in the mirror. I was skinnier, but I was far from healthy or well.

After I graduated from college, I found running. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I wanted to stick with it because I thought that all runners were skinny and I thought I’d FINALLY get one of those skinny runner bodies. Plot twist, I didn’t lose any weight. In fact, today I weigh the exact same today as I did in my “before” weight after my younger brother Scott passed away. The difference is, I eat healthy and satisfying foods and I’ve run 10 marathons. I can’t blame laziness as the reason for my weight because laziness isn’t a word I think anyone would use to describe me.

I move when I want to, because I want to. I run and move because I enjoy it, because it connects me with my community, and because it helps me cope with anxiety, grief, and stress. I run because I love (to hate) it. I enjoy the challenge. I like how I feel when I’m running. (OK, more often than not, I like how I feel AFTER I run.) And I LOVE how strong I feel when I’m running.

Ditching my shirt and joining the #SportsBraSquad didn’t help me magically move towards body acceptance. I didn’t instantaneously get to a place where I can believe it when I say, “THIS is what STRENGTH looks like”!

I never thought I’d be confident enough to feel comfortable running in a sports bra. But one thing creating and joining the #SportsBraSquad has taught me is that it never mattered what anyone else may or may not have thought about it. The problem was how I perceived and spoke to myself. (And societal beauty standards but I think we can all agree that diet culture isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.)

Now, don’t be wrong. I have a ton of thin privilege. Even though I’m not “skinny”, I can still shop at stores that carry my size for the most part. We live in a world that is wildly fat-phobic. To deny that is criminal. And I know that violence against women is also a very real thing. Running in a sports bra is something that a lot of women aren’t comfortable doing.

I understand that ditching your shirt for the first or millionth time can be scary. But if you’ve ever found yourself doing the work on a hot day, wondering what it would feel like to not worry about self-objectifying yourself and just living your life moving in ways that empower you wearing whatever the hell you want, take that first step. I encourage you to join the #SportsBraSquad whether on a run or in the privacy of your own home.

The sports bra squad isn’t just an online movement, we’re here to elevate stories and resources to help you move towards body image resilience. We ALSO are here to help you find a truly supportive sports bra that won’t rub you raw! Turns out, there aren’t many out there! ESPECIALLY if you have bigger boobs. Which I do.

But ditching your shirt for the first time can be terrifying! There's strength in numbers and there’s nothing more powerful than knowing that you’re not alone. Unlearning the lies that diet culture sells is difficult! It isn’t easy adopting body neutrality. We at the Badass Lady Gang believe that every woman should be able to wear whatever they want. If you want to find comfort on a warm day by running in shorts or a sports bra, YOU DESERVE to run in shorts or a sports bra! We know getting to a place of body neutrality is hard and we’re here to move with you every step of the way. From sports bra reviews (Because HELLO?! Why is it so hard to find a truly supportive sports bra?!) to stories, resources and journal prompts to help you redefine your relationship with your body and strength, the #SportsBraSquad is more than just a movement on Instagram. We’re a movement rooted in helping you move towards body acceptance. So join us in person every summer for Global #SportsBraSquad day or post online using the #SportsBraSquad hashtag.

Just remember, health is not a look. It’s a lifestyle. Strength looks different on everyone. So many of us struggle to feel strong in the skin we’re in. You aren’t the problem. DIET CULTURE is.

Love,